By Today’s Flyover People column as seen in The Emporia Gazette:
MOBILITY, INTERRUPTED
I don’t get out of the house much these days.
Can you say fifth metatarsal? Can you say broken?
It’s a sports-related injury; I broke my foot jumping rope, my fitness activity of choice, one I’ve done more or less daily for at least a decade.
Recently, I bought a new pair of shoes. Bad shoes. Shoes that I now spit on.
I’ve learned, a little too late, that I tend to supinate, land toward the outside of my foot. And these new shoes do not have the broad sole that my previous ones offered.
While jumping the other day, when I came down on the outside edge of the new shoe, it did not support me. My right foot curled under, breaking the bone that connects to the little toe.
Since my injury, ten people have related their broken fifth metatarsal stories to me, so – let my broken foot be a lesson to others: check your athletic shoes – is the tread worn more on the outside or the inside edge of the sole? When shopping for your next pair, consider shoes with soles that help compensate if you pronate (lean in) or supinate (lean out).
I can’t put any weight on the foot for six weeks. I can either hop or use crutches. And when I pulled the crutches from their safety seals, I enthusiastically flung myself through the air on them. Whee!
It reminded me of when my brother and I were kids and we set up a make-shift track meet area in our backyard which included a crossbar that we polevaulted over. So, my new crutches were fun in a polevaulting kind of a way. For the first five minutes. Then I realized how exhausting polevaulting is.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, I taught myself how to walk with crutches. Trial and error is a difficult way to learn. And I’m thinking that the combination of crutches and stairs is nature’s way of thinning out the population.
I’ve gained much more empathy and appreciation for others with disabilities, because it’s very clear to me now that each person has adapted and found clever ways to compensate for an out-of-order limb or other malfunctioning body part.
Doing things – anything – now comes with forethought. Because walking with crutches takes five times the effort, efficiency of movement is vital. And any poorly-planned movement could cause secondary injuries.
Determined not to be helpless, I’ve tried to do as much as possible around the house. Dave took over the laundry chores (evil staircase) and grocery shopping (it’s my right foot, I can’t drive), but I’m still cooking and washing dishes.
One learns what works and what doesn’t. For instance – filling ice cube trays then hopping on one leg to the freezer doesn’t work. Water spills on the floor, creating a dangerous environment for anyone (namely me) on crutches.
During the first three days, crutch ruts developed under my arms – tender skin, chafing, and bruising. After complaining about the excruciating armpit soreness, someone clued me in that my arms and shoulders, not my armpits, should support my weight.
Also by the third day, my left leg, which will be double the size of my withering right leg by the end of this event, was tired of hopping.
Early that morning as I leaned my crutches against the counter to hop around the kitchen, my left foot groaned and asked, “Seriously? You want me to hop again today?”
Every step with crutches gave me pain, but, yes, disability encourages resourcefulness. You find tricks and contraptions to make your life work. I thought of something that might help and sent an e-mail request to my friend Jackie Stibal Lutz.
“I never thought I’d be excited about using a walker,” I laughed. Jackie had delivered to me her late mother’s walker – a walker with four wheels (and brakes) and a bench seat.
Around the house, my borrowed scooter-walker beats the polevaulting-crutches all to heck. Now I can transport books, food and iced tea, and fill ice cube trays without spilling a drop.
And it’s fun! I rest the knee of my bum leg on the seat, give a push with my left leg and sail across the hardwood floor in the living room. Whee!
***
Copyright 2009 ~ Cheryl Unruh
Very clever, Cheryl! As usual, another great one!
Hey Cheryl,
If you ask really nicely Jackie may even have an old “hoverround” electric chair to loan you:) Those are really fun if you have the space in your house to use it. Sorry to hear about your foot, you have done a great job describing the situation/solutions.
Thanks, Margo!
Heh – your mom let me try her hoverround once. I wasn’t very good at it.
I think we all need to gather at Cheryl’s house and play on her borrowed walker and the hardwood floor.
Great column Cheryl.
I’m sorry it was my favorite brand of shoes that let you down, literally. But they do make all sorts for all of us who do weird things when we walk.
I’m nursing a bad right knee–and really must get “something done” about it. It does take a lot of thought to even step down off a curb.
With canes, it’s “hold the cane in the hand opposite the injured leg.” Also, “up with the good leg, down with the bad leg.” Since none of the staircases in my house have rails on both sides, they are indeed a challenge.
Hope you continue to heal well.
Really, canes on the opposite side? I did that wrong, too. But I can’t imagine doing it otherwise.
Yeah, Janet, scooter party at my house. You can all ride the walker. Whee!
So sorry to hear/see…it is a pretty color. I have stage two for you – the walking cast I could pass along. I have story number 6…same break on the same foot for me but not in the same way! I was in the ugly witch contest one Halloween and fell off the stage into the orchestra pit. Well, maybe that is not exactly what happened but everyone believed that one simply because I did it on Halloween. Some liked my… I was hit on my bike by a wild trash truck… but in fact, I stepped off the driveway and fell a long quarter of an inch into the grass. The doctor at the emergency room did not believe that one, so I started the long list of likely scenarios… skiing accident, witch contest, bike-truck encounter. Oh by the way, break the crutches – they hurt your arms worse than your foot… rent a wheel chair, it works!!
Cheryl, I’ll bring the floor wax so we can go faster.
The cane is supposed to be in the opposite hand. When you step forward with the bad leg, you move the cane forward too, and you lean your weight onto the cane, thus taking weight off the bad leg. It really does work. When my knee was so bad, using the cane really helped me walk. Still hurt like the devil, but when I did it wrong, it hurt like the devil and all his minions.
Kris, I still say, UP with the good, down with the bad, when I get in and out of the tub. LOL
We have a spiral staircase that I’ve never learned to use properly, so I avoid going up there very often. I have to, even with my legs okay, back down the stairs.
Let’s see, do you have four weeks left in the cast? Was it two weeks ago?
OK, on the cane thing. I guess my problem is that I can’t put ANY weight on the right foot for six weeks. (yep, four more.)
Susie: Loved your stories. Very inventive.
Kris: hope your knee improves. It’s no fun when it hurts to walk and you have to contemplate every move.
I cannot wait until the column you write when the cast comes off, Cheryl. My imagination makes me think of you as a Ricochet Rabbit.
Just so we don’t read in the Gazette about “Local woman crashes mobility aid into TV, spills books, food, and iced tea all over Oprah.”
TeeHee…
LOL, Ray.